Now I've got this here language problem sussed like: only 10 golden rules for the grammar freak .....

  1. Always avoid alliteration
  2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with
  3. Avoid cliches like the plague
  4. It is wrong to ever split an infinitive
  5. Contractions aren't necessary
  6. Foreign words and phrases are not apropos
  7. Don't be redundant; don't use more words than are necessary; its highly superfluous.
  8. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement
  9. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake
  10. Who needs rhetorical questions ?