Windows source code

    
       /*
        TOP SECRET Microsoft(c)  Code
        Project: Chicago(tm)
        Projected release-date: Summer 1998
       */

       #include "win31.h"
       #include "win95.h"
       #include "evenmore.h"
       #include "oldstuff.h"
       #include "billrulz.h"
       #define INSTALL = HARD

       char make_prog_look_big[1600000];

       void main()
       {
               while(!CRASHED)
               {
                       display_copyright_message();
                       display_bill_rules_message();
                       do_nothing_loop();
                       if (first_time_installation)
                       {
                          make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
                          do_nothing_loop();
                          totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
                          search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();
                          hang_system();
                       }
                       write_something(anything);
                       display_copyright_message();
                       do_nothing_loop();
                       do_some_stuff();
                       if (still_not_crashed)
                       {
                               display_copyright_message();
                               basically_run_windows_3.1();
                               do_nothing_loop();
                               do_nothing_loop();
                       }
               }

               if (detect_cache())
                       disable_cache();

               if (fast_cpu())
               {
                       set_wait_states(lots);
                       set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
                       set_mouse(action, jumpy);
                       set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
               }

          /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11"); */
          /* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
          printf("Welcome to Windows 98");
          if (system_ok())
                        crash(to_dos_prompt);
          else
                       system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp",O_CREATE);

          while(something)
          {
                       sleep(5);
                       get_user_input();
                       sleep(5);
                       act_on_user_input();
                       sleep(5);
          }
          create_general_protection_fault();
       }